Finally Happy
by EowynAhsokaLover
Summary: Reincarnation AU. The four times it doesn't work out, and the one time it does: vignettes of Petra and Levi through time. Excerpt: "Petra stares out at the devastation in front of her. Kansas has never been pretty, but now it is dust, less than the dead."


**A/N:** A reincarnation AU. The four times it doesn't work out and the one time it does. Please enjoy.

* * *

"Levi, Levi, Levi," she says, eyes glossy. "Levi," she says silently, picturing him in her head, picturing him smiling, happy and relaxed at last

* * *

Petra sits by the window, collecting her heavy skirts around her. She looks out, down to the busy streets below, the passing horse carriages, the passing bicycles, and the mass of pedestrians. "Petra," her father says, walking into the bedroom. "You have a gentleman visitor today."

She turns away from the window and looks at her father. Her thin fingers rub circles on her skirt. "Oh?"

"Erwin Smith. He's-"

She stands up and her mouth falls slightly open. "Really? Where?"

Her father smiles. His daughter takes little interest in any of her suitors, but she always seems much happier after Mister Smith's visits. "He sent his footman ahead of him, to give us a little warning."

"Ah. Then where's L—Rivaille?"

"He's in the kitchen."

"I think I'll go arrange the tea—no, I believe Mister Smith prefers coffee. I'll go make sure Cook knows. Thank you for telling me father."

He nods and holds the bedroom door open for her as they both leave.

Petra rushes down to the bottom floor of their townhouse. She walks into the kitchen, which is always busy with the banging of pots for dinner, although it is only three in the afternoon. The footman is in the corner of the room, sipping from one of the servant's cups. He is dressed immaculately, even if the quality of his clothes is inferior to his master's. Petra rushes over to him, almost ignoring the cook.

He bows. "Miss Ral."

"Rivaille," she says.

"Miss Petra," the cook comes over to her. "I know Mister Smith likes coffee, but what would you like to drink?"

"I'll have coffee too, Cook."

"It'll keep you up."

"I don't really have anything to do tomorrow."

The cook shakes her head and walks away. Petra looks at Rivaille. "I never really have something to do."

He nods. "Mister Smith's sister often feels the same way. Although she frequently crochets for the needy and participates in protests."

Petra answers quickly. "Well of course I crochet too and I attend meetings. But my father says protests are too rough for me. The police aren't kind to protesters, even wealthy suffragettes."

Rivaille looks at Petra and she wonders if he's pitying her, although it should really be the other way around. "I know. My brother was thrown in jail a week ago while his union was striking."

"That's horrible." She reaches a hand out to comfort him, but withdraws it before she touches him.

"It is, Miss Ral."

For a while, the only sounds come from Cook. Then Petra asks, "What about your parents? How are they doing?"

"The restaurant is doing as badly as ever. Which is to say, they're still poor but still living and still happy."

"What about your sister?"

He hesitates and his hand inches towards his pocket. She wonders if he has cigarettes in there; she knows he is a heavy smoker. "My parents, ah, excommunicated her."

"What did she do? Marry the Irish?"

"Hardly." He waits some more. Finally, he caves. "She joined a brothel."

"Oh. Well." She looks at Rivaille, not knowing what to say next.

"You probably want to move into the parlor, Miss Ral. My master will be here soon."

"Ah," she is no longer smiling. "Yes, Mister Smith. I will go into the parlor, then."

Rivaille bows. "Miss Ral, it was a pleasure as always."

* * *

Petra stares out at the devastation in front of her. Kansas has never been pretty, but now it is dust, less than the dead. Three weeks ago she had buried her father. She had had no idea how sick he was, how much of his food he'd been giving up for her. In his casket, he was skinner than an adolescent boy that just sprung six inches.

"Are you going to be okay?" His voice is deep, suave. He rests his hands on her shoulders and she feels shivers run up and down her body. She doesn't turn to look at him.

"Are you going to be okay?"

"Of course I am."

"Of course you are. You are Rivaille and we are from Kansas. We have to be okay."

He is silent for a long, but he continues to rub her shoulders. Finally, he says, "You look beautiful."

"Don't!" she says.

"Okay. I won't."

She turns around and looks at him. It is hard to look at him and hard to look away. "I'm not marrying you."

"You think I don't know that?"

"Father didn't approve. Now he's dead."

"People die."

She thinks about punching him. Her fists probably wouldn't hurt him at all. "I have to respect his last wishes. Besides, you won't provide for me nearly as well as..."

"You can't even say his name."

"His name is Auruo. I am marrying him today. I'm in my wedding dress."

"Well," he says. Then he says, "I guess I'll marry Hanji then. It'll make her happy. It'll make my family happy. It might, eventually, make me happy." Is he trying to make her jealous? "Will it make you happy?"

"We won't be here. After we marry, we're going to move west."

"Do you think it'll better, easier, out there?"

"No. But I can try." She almost wishes they were younger. If they were, he would say they could still run away, that they could leave right now. He has a horse after all. And if they were younger, she just might do it.

Petra's sister comes out onto the small church's porch. "Petra, are you ready?"

Petra steps away from Levi and nods. "Yes."

"Good. We're about to start." Her sister looks at Levi. "You should find your seat."

* * *

"It's not fair," she says from across the table. "Neither of you wanted to be in this war. You've protested against this war. And now they're making you go?"

Erwin and Levi look at each other. What could they say? Erwin shrugs. "I wish I stayed in school longer. I thought we'd be out by now."

"I wish I had enough money to go to school to being with. Maybe then, I'd have a job they' wouldn't want to pull me out of."

Petra stares at both of them. She wants to cry. "I should be going too."

"No," both men say at the same time.

"They're letting women volunteer! I could go to Vietnam!"

"Most of the women there are nurses," Levi says. "You aren't."

"So?" She crosses her arms.

"If you volunteered," Erwin says, "you'd be supporting the war. We've been drafted. We don't have a choice."

"If you morons think that just because I'm a woman-"

"Petra," Levi reaches and touches her hand, "we don't want you safe because you're a woman. We want you safe because you're our friend, the same reason you want us safe."

Petra can't think of anything else to say.

"It'll be okay," Erwin says. "We'll be okay." They're empty words.

"I'm scared."

The three finish their coffees in silence. When they're done, they stand up. Petra hugs both of them. She'll see them again tomorrow, but after that, she doesn't when she'll see them. If she'll see them. When she hugs Levi, she says, "I'll keep on protesting. I'll be outside the white house every day. That's where you'll find me, when you come back.

He hugs her and for a moment she feels safe. He kisses the top of her head. Then the three of them leave.

* * *

Petra wants to kiss him, she really does. To be honest, she's wanted to since she first met, all that time ago, but Auruo had asked her to senior prom, and then they'd both gone to different colleges across the country from one another. Still, seeing him now, it is like she is sixteen again. He hasn't even grown since then.

"Petra," he says and she wonders if he is smiling. It was hard to read his emotions when he was sixteen, and now, ten years later, he has an even better mask.

"Levi," she says, although questions are forming in her head, the foremost among them being why is he there? The Levi she knew would never have gotten a pet—they were too messy—so why was he at a vet's office. "Um? Are you a customer?"

"Could you imagine me with a pet?"

"It's hard." She thinks he almost smiles.

"When do you get off?"

She looks down at her watch. "I close at six, but I usually stay later to close up."

"I can wait until then." He turns to go sit in one of the front office's chairs, but Petra reaches out a hand and touches his shoulder.

Heat floods her cheeks. "Levi? Why are you here?"

He takes awhile to answer. Finally, he says, "I'm home visiting Erwin. I asked about you and he told me to come here."

"I haven't seen you in eight years."

"There's a lot of catching up to do." He turns and goes sit down.

Because neither of them have eaten yet (and because she discovers that not only did Erwin tell Levi where to find her, he also forcibly drove and dropped him of at the vet) Petra drives them to a cafe near the veterinary office. The cafe is small, but the food is good and the music is never to loud and Petra is familiar with the owners and most of the staff.

After they order, they sit in a booth in the cafe's corners. Before they settle down, Levi leaves to wash his hands before dinner. Petra should probably do the same, even if she cleansed her hands of animals before she left the vet, but someone has to stay at the table. She pulls out the book she's reading and loses herself in it.

"What are you reading?"

Petra looks up startled. He is sitting down across from her, looking perfectly groomed. She blinks. Had he primped in the bathroom or had he looked immaculate at the vet? Neither would surprise her. She suddenly feels self conscious of her grungy clothes and instinctively reaches up to pat her hair. "It's a book by Mary Roach. It's, well, it's a scientific journalism book about cadavers."

He looks at her without saying anything. She fidgets. "You haven't changed, have you?"

There is a hint of fondness in his voice. She smiles. "Have you?"

"I don't know."

"How's the...you joined the air force, didn't you?"

He nods. He had joined to afford college. "I've been promoted a few times, but I'll be able to leave in a couple of years."

"Are you planning to leave?"'

"I haven't decided. It depends on how far I will have gotten and if we've started another war. And if there's anything for me outside the military."

"I'm sure you'll be able to find a job. The economy isn't that bad anymore."

He looks away from her. "Probably."

"So, have you made many friends in the military?

"A few. Erd, Gunter. Actually, Auruo lives near where I'm currently stationed, so we go to dinner every so often."

"How is Auruo? I haven't really kept up with anyone from high school, if they moved away."

Levi fidgets with his signature cravat. "He's the same as ever. He's still head over heels for you."

"Oh." Petra blushes again. "Oh. Well. There's not really—I haven't found anybody, but then I'm only twenty-six." She tries to laugh, but it comes out more like a cough. "I've been on a few dates since high school, of course, and most of my relationships have ended relatively amicably," she sneaks a glance at Levi; he looks as collected as ever, "but nothing's stuck."

"Are you happy?"

She looks down at the hot chocolate she ordered and gives the mug a swirl. "I guess. I've never really been unhappy, not in this life anyway." She smiles. "You know, Hanji thinks she's discovered proof of reincarnation."

"That woman is insane."

"But she's really sweet."

"No Petra, you are sweet." He is staring at her and she is sure her face is redder than her hair.

"Um, thanks?" The server arrives with their food. Petra digs in, careful to use her best table manners. "Are you happy, Levi?"

"I think I could be."

"What would make you happy?"

"I'm happy right now."

She smiles. "Really?"

He nods. "Yes, but I don't know if I'll be happy when I go back."

"Oh." She takes another bite, swallows. "Levi, I-"

"I don't want to be rude," he says, "I don't want to be...untoward. I don't want to screw up my life again."

"Oh," she says. "Oh," she says again, wide eyes. "Levi, would it make you happy if I visited you? I can, you know. I'm my own boss."

"Yes." He swallows. She sees his adam's apple bob up and down. "That would make me very happy."

She stands up. His face is closer to scared than she's ever seen it before. She walks around the table and slides onto his bench. Her heart is beating very fast. She grabs one of his hands and leans forward. She kisses him gently on his lips. He smiles and folds her into a hug, dropping light kisses across her face.


End file.
